I was proud, excited and a little frightened. It was all taking off so quicklyโฆthe more successful the boys were, the further away from me John felt. I was getting used to being a mum, but most of the time I felt like a single parentโฆit was hard not to feel frustrated with being stuck at home. I loved Julian, but I knew that if I hadnโt had him I could have seen much more of John and that was hardโฆI felt shut off from the life he was living. After years at his side, I was excluded, just as it was all happening.
Cynthia LennonJohn needed to escape his reality. I understood completely but I couldn't go along with him.
Cynthia LennonJohn was in constant need of proof of love and security and he was constantly testing people for that proof.
Cynthia LennonWhen John was with me, it was total commitment. Whatever he did outside our relationship didn't seem very important. We were together such a lot of the time that whatever other affairs he had once we met couldn't have amounted to much because I was with him most of the time. He kept me in Liverpool as late as I dared stay.
Cynthia LennonRingo had this habit of lighting up two cigarettes, one for Maureen at the same time that he lit his own. I remember thinking it was a loving thing to do and wishing John did it for me. But that would have been too obviously demonstrative, maybe, for John.
Cynthia Lennon