We need things, and the opposite of them, and we are so rarely completely comfortable.

If you know somebody very well, like your grandmother or your baby sister, you will know when they are real and when they are fake.

it is a sad truth in life that when someone has lost a loved one, friends sometimes avoid the person, just when the presence of friends is most needed.

Even though there are no ways of knowing for sure, there are ways of knowing for pretty sure.

The more I protest that I'm not Lemony Snicket, and that I'm Daniel Handler instead, the more it becomes clear to the audience that I am in fact Lemony Snicket, that I am in fact standing in front of them.

In this book, not only is there no happy ending, there is no happy beginning and very few happy things in the middle.

If you are allergic to a thing, it is best not to put that thing in your mouth, particularly if the thing is cats.