The real Santa Claus is at the mall.

Everyone tells you it's all right to cry, but not enough people say it's all right if you don't want people to know.

Who are you?" Violet asked. It is confusing to fall asleep in the daytime and wake up at night. "what are you doing with Uncle Monty's reptiles?" Klaus asked. It is also confusing to realize you have been sleeping on stairs, rather than in a bed or sleeping bag. "Dixnik?" Sunny asked. It is always confusing why anyone would choose to wear a plaid shirt.

The last safe place is safe no more.

We laughed the rest of the way, because the point of this story is, it is not the cookies. It is the love.

And a refrigerator may hold a basket of strawberries, which would be important if a maniac said to you, "If you don't give me a basket of strawberries right now, I'm going to poke you with this large stick." But when the two elder Baudelaires and Quigley Quagmire opened the refrigerator, they found nothing that would help someone who was wounded, dying of thirst, or being threatened by a strawberry-crazed, stick-carrying maniac.

There are some secrets you want to keep to yourself, even if they don't matter. They might only matter if you keep them secret.