Reyes Farrow. Because perfection is a dirty job, but someone has to do it.

I went down like a drunken cowgirl trying to line dance to Metallica.

We really should get some X-rays,” the EMT said. “You just want to fondle my extraneous body parts,” I said to the EMT.

It is sexy in here or is it just me?

At first, I could lie about my lack of sleep and she'd fall for it, but she started suspecting insomnia when I began seeing purple elephants in the air vents at the office. I knew I shouldn't have asked her about them. I thought maybe she'd redecorated.

He seemed determines, his resolve unwavering. This would take tact. Prudence. Possible Milk Duds.

Hey, boss. Where are you?” she asked. “I just picked up something to eat. What about professional belly dancers?” “Um, I don’t know, maybe with horseradish.