Man, that woman was quick when she wanted to be. But put her behind the wheel of a Buick.
Darynda JonesOh, I forgot to tell you," Cookie said. "Amber wants your dad to get a teriyaki machine so she can sing for all the lonely barflies." "I'm a good singer, mom." Only a twelve-year-old could make the word mom sound blasphemous. I leaned into Cookie, "Does she know its not called--?" "No," she whispered. "Are you gonna tell her?" "No. It's much funnier this way.
Darynda JonesWhere have you been?" I stepped into my apartment and met Uncle Bob's glare with one of my own. "Out trying to pass myself off as a movie producer to get hot guys to sleep with me. Where have you been?
Darynda JonesI sat with my two best friends, knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that only two of us would make it out of there alive. Though I did tend to exaggerate.
Darynda JonesThe dead guy looked at me with wide eyes. โI canโt move my legs.โ I snorted. โYou canโt move your arms either, or your feet or your freaking eyelids. Youโre dead.
Darynda JonesHeโd actually hit me! It didnโt matter that hitting me wasnโt really like hitting a regular girl and Iโd be completely healed in a matter of hours. I was still a freaking girl, and he damned well knew it. Iโd just have to hit him back. With a lead pipe. Or an eighteen-wheeler.
Darynda Jones