I think Twitter is kind of fun, it's not deep and it never will be, but it's a great way to communicate one-liners and to sort of see what people are laughing about. It's a terrific source of misinformation.

I do some of my best reading while seated in the bathroom.

I now realize that the small hills you see on ski slopes are formed around the bodies of forty-seven-year-olds who tried to learn snowboarding.

Disney Resort and World and Compound, a place where your dreams really do come true, if you dream about having people wearing enormous cartoon-animal heads come around to your restaurant table and act whimsical and refuse to go away until you laugh with delight.

Bad grammar is the leading cause of slow, painful death in North America.

Today's beauty ideal, strictly enforced by the media, is a person with the same level of body fat as a paper clip.

I believe that we parents must encourage our children to become educated, so they can get into a good college that we cannot afford.