I have already spent roughly five thousand hours asleep next to you. This has to mean something.

This is what a memorial is: standing still, staring at something that isn’t ther

Laughter rarely lasts longer than a few seconds, it's true. But how enjoyable those few seconds are.

Things that matter are not easy. Feelings of happiness are easy. Happiness is not. Flirting is easy. Love is not. Saying you’re friends is easy. Being friends is not.

Are you a vegetarian?' I ask, based on the evidence in front of me. She nods. 'Why?' 'Because I have this theory that when we die, every animal that we've eaten has a chance at eating us back. So if you're a carnivore and you add up all the animals you've eaten--well, that's a long time in purgatory, being chewed.' 'Really?' She laughs. 'No. I'm just sick of the question. I mean, I'm a vegetarian because I think it's wrong to eat other sentient creatures. And it sucks for the environment.

I'm not in love with you.

me: you know what sucks about love? o.w.g.: what? me: that it's so tied to the truth.