"I want you to spend the night," you said. And it was definitely your phrasing that ensured it. If you had said, "Let's have sex," or "Let's go to my place," or even "I really want you," I'm not sure we would have gone quite as far as we did. But I loved the notion that the night was mine to spend, and I immediately decided to spend it with you.
David Levithantiny: but there is the word, this word phil wrayson taught me once: weltschmerz. it's the depression you feel when the world as it is does not line up with the world as you think it should be. i live in a big goddamned weltzschermz ocean, you know? and so do you.
David LevithanI cannot think of a single word to describe what we feel. I think we all feel it, to varying degrees. Perhaps in some other language there is a word for 'the world is terribly wrong.' That feeling of stun and unbelief and abandonment and shock and horror and distress.
David LevithanDo you know when you cross against traffic? You look down the street and see a car coming, but you know you can get across before it gets to you. So even though thereโs a DONโT WALK sign, you cross anyway. And thereโs always a split second when you turn and see that car coming, and you know that if you donโt continue moving, it will all be over. Thatโs how I feel a lot of the time. I know Iโll make it across. I always make it across. But the car is always there, and I always stop to watch it coming.
David LevithanI mean, what if love isn't a yes-or-no question? It's not either you're in love or you're not. I mean, aren't there different levels? And maybe these things, like words and expectations and whatever, don't go on top of the love. Maybe it's like a map, and they all have their own place, and then when you see it from the sky - whoa.
David Levithan