So I said I wanted you to stay, even though nothing could stay the same.

Some days are like this. And the only way to get through them is to remember that they are only one day, and that every day ends.

Maybe your history just repeats and repeats until it batters you enough to snap the seams that hold you together

And still, for all the jealously, all the doubt, sometimes I will be struck with a kind of awe that we're together. That someone like me could find someone like you --- it renders me wordless. Because surely words would conspire against such luck, would protest the unlikelihood of such a turn of events.

But I still has enough longing for that concept that I didn't want to dispel it completely. Meaning: I didn't want to tell Lily that I felt we'd all been duped by Plato and the idea of a soul mate. Just in case it turned out that she was mine.

It was so much easier when I didn't want anything. Not getting what you want can make you cruel.

Eventually she fell asleep, but I kept the phone against my ear, lulled by her breathing, and her breathing again in the background. And yes, it felt like home. Like everything belonged exactly where it was.