And it was at moments like this that she had to remind herself that she was in love with him, or had once been in love with him, a long time ago.
David NichollsIt would be inappropiate, undignified, at 38, to conduct friendships or love affairs with the ardour or intensity of a 22 year old. Falling in love like that? Writing poetry? Crying at pop songs? Dragging people into photobooths? Taking a whole day to make a compilation tape? Asking people if they wanted to share your bed, just for company? If you quoted Bob Dylan or TS Eliot or, god forbid, Brecht at someone these days they would smile politely and step quietly backwards, and who would blame them? Ridiculous, at 38, to expect a song or book or film to change your life.
David NichollsI suppose the important thing is to make some sort of difference,โ she siad. โYou know, actually change something.โ โWhat, like โchange the worldโ, you mean?โ โNot the whole entire world. Just the little bit around you.
David NichollsOccasionally, very occasionally, say at four oโclock in the afternoon on a wet Sunday, she feels panic-stricken and almost breathless with loneliness. Once or twice she has been known to pick up the phone to check that it isnโt broken. Sometimes she thinks how nice it would be to be woken by a call in the night: โget in a taxi nowโ or โI need to see you, we need to talkโ. But at the best of times she feels like a character in a Muriel Spark novel โ independent, bookish, sharp-minded, secretly romantic.
David Nicholls