I've taken up the Bible again, somewhat in the spirit of W.C. Fields - looking for loopholes.

Malta is a sod of a place.

Tell me that I misunderstood a joke, but don't tell me that my choice of cravat is wrong.

Old age has got to start creeping up on me one day soon, and frankly I'm very scared. I don't want to be old. I've always felt so young. And I want to stay that way.

Ultra competitive people who always need to win end up enjoying things less.

As any man, I, of course, have certain preferences. Being a Scot by birth, I'm inclined to favor those with a well-scrubbed look and a hint of color in their cheeks-put there by an early walk in the chill air rather than by rouge. The smell of soap on a woman's skin or the hint of shampoo in her hair is perfume enough for me . . . Humor is important. The most beautiful woman in the world is a bore without that.

Dreams don't have an expiration date.