How can both Nics, the loving and considerate and generous one, and the self-obsessed and self-destructive one, be the same person?

Through Nic's drug addiction, I have learned that parents can bear almost anything....I shock myself with my ability to rationalize and tolerate things once unthinkable. The rationalizations escalate....It's only marijuana. He gets high only on weekends. At least he's not using hard drugs.

At my worst, I even resented Nic because an addict, at least when high, has a momentary respite from his suffering. There is no similar relief for parents or children or husbands or wives or others who love them.

A world of contradictions, wherein everything is gray and almost nothing is black and white.

Here's a note to the parents of addicted children: Choose your music carefully...There are millions of treacherous moments.

How can both Nics, the loving and considerate and generous one, and the self-obsessed and self-destructive one, be the same person?

Along with the joy of parenthood, with every child comes a piercing vulnerability. It is at once sublime and terrifying