I've always been a writer, I've always been a storyteller, but I never thought about screenwriting.

The primary job for women in Hollywood is still super-attractive actress. That is the most high-profile women's job in Hollywood.

I'm glad that as a 33-year-old working mother, I can still choose to wear a Hello Kitty T-shirt or stay up late scrolling through the Twitter feed of my junior-high crush.

A few months ago, I had the pleasure of actually visiting the Playboy Mansion. I saw the peacocks, fed grapes to the monkeys, and even braved the fabled Grotto. After seeing the estate, I understood why anyone would be reluctant to leave.

Tabloid photos capture people at their most self-conscious and disoriented; in real life, Paris Hilton is like an elegant paper crane.

Honestly, this will never happen because she's so much classier than me, but I would love to work with Sofia Coppola.

Bren MacGuff: Well, honey, doctors are sadists who like to play God and watch lesser people scream.