[My mother] once cooked a ham and later found it in my father's shirt drawer. I am not kidding.

I've retired so many times now it's getting to be a habit.

Haters are going to hate.

We should never judge a day by its weather.

I'm not quite as much of a curmudgeon being old. I'm not cantankerous. But otherwise, I'm about the same.

I found out retirement means playing golf, or I don't know what the hell it means. But to me, retirement means doing what you have fun doing.

I had an uncle who had a car with a rumble seat, and I used to love to ride in that thing. I mentioned this to some kids, and they were like, "What are you even talking about?"