I've been paying alimony since I was 14 and child support since 15. That's a joke, but not by much

Sometimes I wonder how I got into comedy at all.

I did movie star impressions as a kid in high school. Somehow they just got out of hand.

It was a special show that became a cult classic of sorts, and I made a lot of money for it.

I like getting married, but I don't like being married.

I've been paying alimony since I was 14 and child support since 15. That's a joke, but not by much

I remember that the priest finally said to me, 'You wouldn't like to have a religion that makes things easy for you.' Now I know that both faith and intellect are components of religious belief.