If you ever go to Las Vegas, and you will, just go for a few days. I was there recently for seven days, seven days in Vegas. After I blew all my money on gambling and prostitution, I had six days to kill.
Doug BensonBig deal... the only cats that don't have three legs are the ones with two through zero legs.
Doug BensonThe genius' behind the new Rocky movie decided to call it Rocky Balboa so that we'll probably forget that it's number six. Or Rocky Balboa can't count past five.
Doug BensonThe thing is girls will always say you're lying when you say you had sex with them when you're lying about having sex with them.
Doug Benson