Even the evil-looking bird perched on a rod in the bar had stopped screeching out the names and addresses of local contract killers, which was a service it provided for free.

Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.

To give real service you must add something which cannot be bought or measured with money, and that is sincerity and integrity.

One of the most important things you learn from the internet is that there is no 'them' out there. It’s just an awful lot of 'us.'

You ARE Zaphod Beeblebrox?' 'Yeah,' said Zaphod, 'but don't shout it out or they'll all want one.' 'THE Zaphod Beeblebrox?' 'No, just A Zaphod Beeblebrox, didn't you hear I come in six packs?' 'But sir,' it squealed, 'I just heard on the sub-ether radio report. It said you were dead...' 'Yeah, that's right, I just haven't stopped moving yet.

Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.

I was created to fulfill a function and I failed in it. I negated my own existence.