Do you find coming to terms with the mindless tedium of it all presents an interesting challenge?

I say what it occurs to me to say when I think I hear people say things. More I cannot say.

What god would be hanging around Terminal Two of Heathrow Airport trying to catch the 15:37 flight to Oslo?

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing noise they make as they go by.

As a result of all this hardship, dirt, thirst, and wombats, you would expect Australians to be a dour lot. Instead, they are genial, jolly, cheerful, and always willing to share a kind word with a stranger, unless they are an American.

Ha, but my life is a box of wormgears.

There is no point in using the word 'impossible' to describe something that has clearly happened.