Even a manically depressed robot is better to talk to than nobody.

A life that is burdened with expectations is a heavy life. Its fruit is sorrow and disappointment.

Presidents don't have power. Their job is to draw attention away from it.

Being offended by things is the world's big hobby at the moment. It's almost taken over from wearing goatee beards.

But what about the End of the Universe? We'll miss the big moment." I've seen it. It's rubbish," said Zaphod,"nothing but a gnab gib." A what?" Opposite of a big bang. Come on, let's get zappy.

Well, I mean, yes idealism, yes the dignity of pure research, yes the pursuit of truth in all its forms, but there comes a point I'm afraid where you begin to suspect that the entire multidimensional infinity of the Universe is almost certainly being run by a bunch of maniacs. And if it comes to a choice between spending yet another ten million years finding that out, and on the other hand just taking the money and running, then I for one could do with the exercise.

He was a dreamer, a thinker, a speculative philosopher... or, as his wife would have it, an idiot.