I'm very drawn to Eastern Europe, so I like a Hungarian writer who wrote in French called Emil Cioran; he was always good for giving me such a stir.

I can't relax here. These people have no pubic hair anywhere. We have pubic hair on the ceiling.

I enjoy performing, always, but when you're taping a gig, you've got to blank out this mass apparatus of self-consciousness that's surrounding you, this invitation to drown in self-consciousness. Otherwise you just won't be able to do anything.

All the shy people are doomed! Natural selection favors the loud and the aggressive

I get a phone call once every 18 months from some mad person who wants me to do something for less than no money and they give me about a week's notice. That's my film career, most of the time.

I'll work for whoever wants to hire me. Even the jewelry channel.

Fruit... it's just God showing off. "Look at all the colours I know!"