I don't mind most religious people, I talk to them. I listen to them, you know, banging on. "I prayed very hard and then the fairy came." "Did he? Good. Have a biscuit." I only get annoyed when they try and make me see the fairy. "You have to let the fairy into your heart." Look, I wouldn't let him into my garden, okay? I'd shoot him on sight, if he existed, which he doesn't. Now have another biccie and be quiet, will you please?
Dylan MoranIf you're a comic, you don't have a rehearsal room, you rehearse on stage. My main concern is remembering everything.
Dylan MoranPeople will kill you over time, and how they'll kill you is with tiny, harmless phrases, like 'be realistic.'
Dylan MoranI do think it's perfectly natural and human to want to invest belief in something. It's just a facet of who we are. What do I believe in? I believe in the obvious things. The people I'm close to and my work - it's not complicated.
Dylan Moran