I will blow your face clean off your face!

The other day I got out the shower and I bend down to reach for a towel, and I felt a sharp pain in my chest. Shot through my chest and up around my shoulder and down my spine. I thought 'Oh, Lord.' I thought I was dying. I bent over and looked, and I was standing on my own titty.

My wife ain't gonna make love to me if I got no money!

I haven't read a newspaper in 20 years. I don't look at the computer or anything. You have to have a filter on what you let in.

Flowers are the fastest way to a woman's heart. Well, actually, the fastest way is through her rib cage, but flowers are a lot less messy.

I'd like to produce, direct, write, score, and star in a film in exactly the way Chaplin did. I'll do that before I'm thirty.

Growing up, I liked all the stuff that everyone else was listening to, like Motown, but the biggest group of all was The Beatles.