Is there a God? Who knows? Is there an angry unicorn on the dark side of the moon?

Love implies anger. The man who is angered by nothing cares about nothing.

No man is wise enough to be another man's master. Each man's as good as the next -- if not a damn sight better.

Some of my ancestors fought in the American Revolution. A few more wore red coats, a few wore blue coats, and the rest wore no coats at all. We never did figure out who won that war.

A cowboy is a farm boy in leather britches and a comical hat.

If there's anything I hate, it's the vibraphone. And the cha-cha-cha. And Latin rhythms generally.

A cowboy is a hired hand on the middle of a horse contemplating the hind end of a cow.