Preacher to me: 'A dollar for the Lord, brother?' Me to preacher: 'That's all right, I'm headed his way. I'll give it to him when I see him.'

I am hopeful, though not full of hope, and the only reason I don't believe in happy endings is because I don't believe in endings.

A house built on greed cannot long endure.

The response to my books from my East Coast friends has been wildly various, running the gamut from 'bad' to 'very bad.' (Is there another gamut?)

As a confirmed melancholic, I can testify that the best and maybe only antidote for melancholia is action. However, like most melancholics, I suffer also from sloth.

What did Jesus say to the headwaiter at the Last Supper? 'Separate checks, please.'

Why do I live in the desert? Because the desert is the *locus Dei*.