I watch people's behavior and notice things. I think that's why I became a comedian. I notice how stupid the things we do are.
Ellen DeGeneresI wonder what will happen if i put a hand cream on my feet, will they get confused and start clapping?
Ellen DeGeneresI've got a lot to say about television. There's a lot going on in television right now and I feel like a huge part of television.
Ellen DeGeneresI had no intention of becoming a comedian. I just wanted to make people happy. I tried everything-I shucked oysters, I painted houses, I sold vacuum cleaners. But there was always a voice saying, You should be doing something different. And it was usually my boss and I was being fired.
Ellen DeGeneres