I do it because I love animals and I saw the reality. And I just couldn't ignore it anymore. I'm healthier for it, I'm happier for it. I can't imagine that if you're putting something in your body that is filled with fear or anxiety or pain, that that isn't somehow going to be inside of you.

I appreciate your giving my book -- and in no small way, me -- a chance. To thank you, I really wanted to acknowledge all of you in the book. Unfortunately, I didn't have enough room for each name. So I've put in a code name that stands for all of you reading this book. The name is 'Mom.' It will be our little secret. So when you see 'Mom' in the acknowledgments, you'll know I'm really talking about you. And don't let my mother try to tell you otherwise.

Did you ever feel like the whole world was going to a party and your invitation got lost in the mail?

There's lotion for your face, for your hands, for your feet, for your body. Why? What would happen if you put hand lotion on your feet? Would your feet get confused and start clapping? Each kind has something special in it - aloe, shea butter, coconut, cocoa butter, vanilla, lemon extract. That's not lotion. That's one ingredient short of a Bundt cake.

Penguins mate for life. Which doesn't really surprise me, because they all look exactly alike. It's not like they're gonna meet a better-looking penguin someday.

I don't understand the sizes anymore. There's a size zero, which I didn't even know that they had. It must stand for: 'Ohhh my God, you're thin.'

No, we can't be friends. You're my mom. You're what i talk to my friends about.