All of my friends were seeing a therapist, and I thought something was wrong with me that I didn't see a therapist. So I went to a therapist to find out why I wasn't seeing a therapist. And it turns out I'm very screwed up. Thank God I found a therapist to tell me for $125 an hour.
Ellen DeGeneresI admire people who know they can't sing. There are so many people out there who can't sing, but they think they can, so they sing a lot.
Ellen DeGeneresStuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but itโs worse when you see them wearing dark glasses, having streamers around their necks and a hat on their antlers. Because then you know they were enjoying themselves at a party when they were shot.
Ellen DeGeneresI'm sure men have their own ways of trying to demean one another, but women can be very gossipy and judgmental, and that doesn't help.
Ellen DeGeneresI was in yoga the other day. I was in full lotus position. My chakras were all aligned. My mind is cleared of all clatter and I'm looking out of my third eye and everything that I'm supposed to be doing. It's amazing what comes up, when you sit in that silence. "Mama keeps whites bright like the sunlight, Mama's got the magic of Clorox 2."
Ellen DeGeneresAnd the bottom line is we are who we are-we look a certain way, we talk a certain way, we walk a certain way. I strut because Iโm a supermodel, and sometimes I gallop for fun. When we learn to accept that, other people learn to accept us. So be who you really are. Embrace who you are. Literally. Hug yourself. Accept who you are. Unless youโre a serial killer.
Ellen DeGeneres