Baloney is just salami with an inferiority complex.

No one is perfect, except for Penélope Cruz.

One time I actually cleaned out my closet so good I ended up on the cover of Time magazine.

I think we need more love in the world. We need more kindness, more compassion, more joy, more laughter. I definitely want to contribute to that.

The legend goes that St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland. I was thinking... that must be hard to put all the tiny seatbelts on all the snakes.

I'm a godmother, that's a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I taught her that.

Portia and I have been married for 4 years and they have been the happiest of my life. And in those 4 years, I don't think we hurt anyone else's marriage. I asked all of my neighbors and they say they're fine