There were only two men on the planet better educated in the various martial arts than Butler, and he was related to one of them. The other lived on an island in the South China Sea, and spent his days meditating and beating up palm trees. You had to feel sorry for the B'wa Kell.

If you're going to read five books, three should be issues and two for fun.

Artemis ducked. Cudgeon didn't. Guess what? Artemis was smarter.

...Hardly. A ragged apron does not a waiter make.

Commander: What's that? Foaly: It's a finger, what does look like?

Foaly twitched his tail contentedly. Genius. No point in being humble about it.

Artemis Fowl grinned right back at him and pointed his index finger to the sky... from the tip of this finger sprang a small blue spark that exploded like a tiny firework. “I know magic can be stolen,” said Artemis. “Because I stole some myself.