Foaly: Anyone see you come in here? Holly: The FBI, CIA, NSA, DEA, MI6. Oh, and the EIB. Foaly: The EIB? Holly: (smirking) Everyone in the building.

If you were me, then I'd be you, and if I were you, then I'd hide somewhere far away.

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom.

(about his terrible attempt at making a sandwich) It's more difficult than it looks. (Artemis Fowl)

Listen to me, convict. I have not traveled all this way to listen to your war stories. So shut your trap before I shut it for you. Commander Julius Root

Either that boy is the sanest creature on Earth, he thought, or he is so disturbed that our tests cannot even begin to scratch the surface.

And I will not be beaten by that jackass." "Jackass?" said Foaly, wounded. "My favorite uncle is a jackass.