How did that go?’ he asked. ‘Your first lengthy conversation with a girl your own age?’ ‘Fabulous,’ said Artemis, voice dripping with sarcasm. ‘We’re planning a June wedding.

I'm not threatening you. I'm just informing you of police procedure. If you continue to obstruct me, I remove the obstruction, in this case you, and proceed to the next command.

In spite of what youngsters think, parents do not get a sneaky thrill out of punishing their children.

The thing about reading is that if you are hooked, you're not going to stop just because one series is over; you're going to go and find something else.

Excuse me, Captain. Are you two going to weep salty tears of admiration over a helmet all night, or do we have matters to discuss?

Doobie always wanted to see the badge. It was shiny, and he was eight.

But even though there were plenty of teeth in the grin, there was no heart.