Bear in mind the simple rule, X squared to the power of two minus five over the seven point eight three times nineteen is approximately equal to the cube root of MCC squared divided by X minus a quarter of a third percent. Keep that in mind, and you can't go very far wrong.

Life has a very simple plot: first you're here and then you're not.

I think you often learn from failure. Success just teaches you how great you were, but in fact it's knowing what will fail that will help you to make the right choices.

They're a typical Hollywood audience. All the kids are on drugs and all the adults are on roller skates.

Writers tend to suffer from back problems because they spend their time bent over a desk.

Nobody gets irony anymore, as we are now living in the post-ironic age. Once George Bush gets a library, our irony is dead.

Pattycake, pattycake, baker's man; good morning, madam, I'm a psychiatrist