Few things in life are certain except death and being taxed.

I cannot abide being bored.

America is an empire. I hope you know that now. All empires, by definition, are bumbling, shambolic, bullying, bureaucratic affairs, as certain of the rightness of their cause in infancy, as they are corrupted by power in their dotage.

Fear not. For fear itself is fed by fear, and all fears pass. Did no one tell you so? Come take my hand, my friend, and we will peer into this fear's abyss. And jump! And know.

I have an over-attachment to precision, which is why I've sold more magazines than any man alive.

For me, temptation is life and I have a gargantuan appetite for everything.

I never sue journalists. I employ journalists. I employ too many of them. I don't sue journalists.