When I started publishing, I got offers to write for big magazines. But I would always say, "Well, it's not that I don't want to write for these big magazines, but you can't edit it."

Television turned out to be exactly as bad as the most irritating and pedantic intellectuals of the '50s said it was going to be.

There's too much democracy in the culture, not enough in the society.

How do you know if your child is a writer? Your obstetrician holds his stethoscope to your abdomen and only hears excuses.

Children are rarely in the position to lend one a truly interesting sum of money. There are, however, exceptions, and such children are an excellent addition to any party.

There were a zillion bad jobs. That doesn't exist any more. I mean, I could wake up one afternoon with zero money and know that by the end of the day, I would have money.

[Friendships] are easy to get out of compared to love affairs, but they are not easy to get out of compared to, say, jail.