Never relinquish clothing to a hotel valet without first specifically telling him that you want it back.

Don't bother discussing sex with small children. They rarely have anything to add.

All the time I'm not writing I feel like a criminal. It's horrible to feel felonious every second of the day. It's much more relaxing to actually write.

New York's not exactly antiseptic. It could be clean and less dangerous, and not horrible, not under a tidal wave of tourists.

By the time everyone catches up with you, you're bored.

for someone such as myself, who is kind of feckless and immature, it's better to have rich friends than to be rich yourself, because then you have wealth without the responsibility. You get to go to their houses, and you get acquainted with a level of furniture that you cannot provide for yourself. Furniture, I think is the most important attribute of rich people.

Bread that must be sliced with an axe is bread that is too nourishing.