Citizen's Band radio renders one accessible to a wide variety of people from all walks of life. It should not be forgotten that all walks of life include conceptual artists, dry cleaners, and living poets.

Communists all seem to wear small caps, a look I consider better suited to tubes of toothpaste than to people.

It's very important who the president of the United States is. America is a great idea, so that's why it's a great country.

People (a group that in my opinion has always attracted an undue amount of attention) have often been likened to snowflakes. This analogy is meant to suggest that each is unique - no two alike. This is quite patently not the case. People, even at the current rate of inflation - in fact, people especially at the current rate of inflation - are quite simply a dime a dozen. And, I hasten to add, their only similarity to snowflakes resides in their invariably and lamentable tendency to turn, after a few warm days, to slush.

Take away a man's actual sense of manhood - which is conventionally based on the ability to work, to earn money, to be self-sufficient, to provide for children - and you've got to give them something else. And they did.

Don't bother discussing sex with small children. They rarely have anything to add.

I drank my lifetime supply of alcohol and I took my lifetime supply of drugs between the ages of 15 and 19.