My dad being a player. I was never that quick as a kid, so I had to get quicker. I trained hard. I was never that player who could roll out and relax, like Michael [ Owen] or Stevie [ Gerrard], who were natural.

If I lose the ball, I lose it trying to do the right thing. That's the way it is.

Of course it is going to be difficult for any player to get in the Chelsea side no matter who they are.

I remember being in West Ham's youth team and seeing Jody Morris play for Chelsea at 17 and you scoring for Liverpool on your debut when you were 18. I was watching it on Soccer Saturday and I was like, "I can't believe he's scored!" It's professional jealousy. It's best to be honest about it. It gave me real desire. I was thinking "God I want that to be me".

When you take a lot of stick you want to ram it down people's throats.

I read Michael Caine's biography. It was about him growing up

In terms of not retiring? I don't want to leave and think to myself, "Maybe I should have stayed a bit longer". I'm dwelling on it. I have turned down a few Premier League offers. But the fact is, after being at Chelsea for so long and a year with Manchester City, I don't want to get involved in a relegation dogfight.