The best revenge is the massive success.

Bad reviews I've gotten never diminished the number of people in my audience; good reviews have never added to the number of people in my audience; be your own critic.

There are things about organized religion which I resent. Christ is revered as the Prince of Peace, but more blood has been shed in his name than any other figure in history. You show me one step forward in the name of religion, and I'll show you a hundred retrogressions…I'm for decency—period. I'm for anything and everything that bodes love and consideration for my fellow man. But when lip service to some mysterious deity permits bestiality on Wednesday and absolution on Sunday—count me out.

Don't get even, get mad.

That's life,and I can't deny it/Many times I thought of cuttin' out but my heart won't buy it.

You only live once, and the way I live, once is enough.

A man doesn't know what happiness is until he's married. By then it's too late.