While your children are sleeping, your puppy is crappin'.
Communism doesn't work because people like to own stuff.
The most abundant element in the Universe is stupidity
People are just waiting around to get certified.
The disgusting stink of a too-loud electric guitar; now that's my idea of a good time.
I proceeded to take that mitten full of the deadly yellow snow crystals and rub it all into his beady little eyes with a vigorous circular motion.