I usually don't work with other people; I do the whole show myself.

Where I come from, when a Catholic marries a Lutheran it is considered the first step on the road to Minneapolis.

Honesty is a rare commodity in a palace, and that is why so many fairy-tale marriages end up on the rocks.

One reads books in order to gain the privilege of living more than one life. People who don't read are trapped in a mine shaft, even if they think the sun is shining.

Some people have a love of their fellow man in their hearts, and others require a light anesthetic.

My ancestors were Puritans from England. They arrived here in 1648 in the hope of finding greater restrictions than were permissible under English law at that time.

Humor has to surprise us; otherwise, it isn't funny. It's a death knell for a writer to be labeled a humorist because then it's not a surprise anymore.