... and people are to march around the church to commemorate the event, Palm Sunday, when Jesus rode into Jerusalem and was greeted with applause and with palms. People thought he had come to overthrow the Romans, but ... no ... he had come to change THEM ... and that led to things turning bad.

A good newspaper is never nearly good enough but a lousy newspaper is a joy forever.

I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it.

Roy Blount's stuff makes me laugh so hard, sometimes I have to go sit in a room and shut the door

To choose Norm Coleman over Walter Mondale is like going to a great steakhouse and ordering the tuna sandwich.

Humor, a good sense of it, is to Americans what manhood is to Spaniards, and we will go to great lengths to prove it. Experiments with laboratory rats have shown that, if one psychologist in the room laughs at something a rat does, all of the other psychologists will laugh equally. Nobody wants to be left holding the joke.

I was an English major at the University of Minnesota, and I was very shy, which many people misinterpreted as intelligence. On the basis of that wrong impression, I became the editor of the campus literary magazine.