I'm aware, as a sane person, that I'm not the best-looking guy in the world. I'm aware of it. But when I go into a party, I will walk out with your girlfriend.

Let's say you're a garage mechanic, and you have big dreams about opening up your own chain of branded garages around the country. Terrific.

I worship scones and danishes. If I never had another meal, I wouldn't care as long as I could eat pastries and jelly doughnuts.

When you really think about it, I'm not delusional enough to think that what I do is important to life as we know it on this planet. No. But neither is what you do.

Let's look different! I like monster movies, so why can't I have Godzilla's face on my boots?

Before you go out there and try to conquer the universe... get your act together.

Fiscally, I'm very conservative. I don't believe in welfare states. I believe in giving people jobs.