It is a cliche, and it is also true, that humor springs from existential pain - from a need to blunt the awareness that life is essentially a fatal disease of unpredictable symptoms and unknown duration.

I don't think the people of Chicago should be robbed of their birthright to be perennial losers.

I disagree with those who suggest that we permanently close down the U.S. mail on the grounds that it can kill you. That is sheer hysteria. I think we should permanently close down the U.S. mail on the grounds that it has been making us sick for quite a while.

I don't see a point in advertising my marital status when men don't. Completely ridiculous.

International politics is not my strong suit. The older I get the less certain I am that I even HAVE a strong suit.

The Jewish women like Bethany Mandel fare the worst, because they are getting both antisemitic stuff and anti-woman stuff.

I think politics is everything.