When you find something funny search it for hidden truth.

With the single exception of Homer, there is no eminent writer, not even Sir Walter Scott, whom I can despise so entirely as I despise Shakespeare when I measure my mind against his. . . . It would positively be a relief to me to dig him up and throw stones at him.

I must ... warn my readers that my attacks are directed against themselves, not against my stage figures.

Don't waste time collecting other people's autographs; rather devote it to making your own autograph worth collecting.

The philosopher is Nature's pilot. And there you have our difference: to be in hell is to drift: to be in heaven is to steer.

My religion? Well, my dear, I am a Millionaire. That is my religion.

Imagination is the beginning of creation.