You propound a complicated arithmetical problem: say cubing a number containing four digits. Give me a slate and half an hour's time, and I can produce a wrong answer.

Oh, well, if you want original conversations, you'd better go and talk to yourself.

If the English can survive their food, they can survive anything.

Nowadays a parlor maid as ignorant as Queen Victoria was when she came to the throne would be classed as mentally defective.

Kings are not born: they are made by artificial hallucination.

The play was a great success, but audience was a dismal failure.

Here there is no hope, and consequently no duty, no work, nothing to be gained by praying, nothing to be lost by doing what you like. Hell, in short, is a place where you have nothing to do but amuse yourself.