The wheels are turning, but the hamsters are all dead. Make it idiot-proof and someone will make a better idiot. I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig, you get dirty; and besides, the pig likes it.

Americans adore me and will go on adoring me until I say something nice about them.

You have no right to say that I am not sincere. I have found a happiness in art that real life has never given me. I am intensely in earnest about art. There is is a magic and mystery in art that you know nothing of.

I wish people would stop talking about my birthday.

A man who loses his money gains, at the least, experience, and sometimes, something better.

For nearly twenty years I have been a published author... But I have never yet seen a book of mine offered for sale in a shop window.

The ordinary man is an anarchist. He wants to do as he likes. He may want his neighbour to be governed, but he himself doesn't want to be governed. He is mortally afraid of government officials and policemen.