It is one of the mysterious ways of Allah to make women troublesome when he makes them beautiful.

Must then a Christ perish in torment in every age to save those that have no imagination.

There is nothing on earth intended for innocent people so horrible as a school.

I shall always be a flower girl to Professor Higgins, because he always treats me as a flower girl, and always will; but I know I can be a lady to you, because you always treat me as a lady, and always will.

The educated man is a greater nuisance than the uneducated one.

Heartbreak is life educating us.

I am sorry to have to introduce the subject of Christmas. It is an indecent subject; a cruel, gluttonous subject; a drunken, disorderly subject; a wasteful, disastrous subject; a wicked, cadging, lying, filthy, blasphemous and demoralizing subject. Christmas is forced on a reluctant and disgusted nation by the shopkeepers and the press: on its own merits it would wither and shrivel in the fiery breath of universal hatred; and anyone who looked back to it would be turned into a pillar of greasy sausages.