The politician who once had to learn to flatter Kings has now to learn how to fascinate, amuse, coax, humbug, frighten, or otherwise strike the fancy of the electorate.

When God created man and woman, he did not take a patent. That's why any imbecile has been able to do so ever since.

A little learning is a dangerous thing, but we must take that risk because a little is as much as our biggest heads can hold.

Idiots are always in favour of inequality of income (their only chance of eminence), and the really great in favour of equality.

Those who admire modern civilization usually identify it with the steam engine and the electric telegraph.

Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.

The function of comedy is to dispelunconsciousness by turning the searchlight of the keenest moral and intellectual analysisright on to it.