Japan is, you often feel, an improved version of the United States.

If it is gay, ribald and lascivious night-life you are after, Israel is not the place for you. The night clubs you do find are nearer in spirit to a YMCA than to dens of iniquity.

English humor resembles the Loch Ness Monster in that both are famous but there is a strong suspicion that neither exists.

Jokes are better than war. Even the most aggressive jokes are better than the least aggressive wars. Even the longest jokes are better than the shortest wars.

Long before the word Zionism was uttered for the first time, old religious Jews came from all over the world to die in Jerusalem. It is the finest place to die in - it has always been acknowledged. It has a joie de mourir quite its own.

Nobody uses his car in New York, because so many people use it that traffic is congested and unbearably slow.

People on the Continent either tell you the truth or lie; in England they hardly ever lie, but they would not dream of telling you the truth.