On the Continent people have good food; in England people have good table manners.

Television is of great educational value. It teaches you while still young how to (a) kill, (b) rob, (c) embezzle, (d) shoot, (e) poison, and, generally speaking, (f) how to grow up into a Wild West outlaw or gangster by the time you leave school.

If it is gay, ribald and lascivious night-life you are after, Israel is not the place for you. The night clubs you do find are nearer in spirit to a YMCA than to dens of iniquity.

Rich people (in Australia) have swimming pools in their gardens but, at least, they do swim in them.

On the Continent people have good food; in England people have good table manners.

Nobody uses his car in New York, because so many people use it that traffic is congested and unbearably slow.

'I don't say a Zionist must be insane,' said President Weizmann, 'but it helps if he is.'